Does everyone have a touch of Control Freak in them?

I try not to be one, but I am.  I cross the line.  I've been slowly learning  this and battling with this, but recently God has lifted the heavy burden I've been carrying around of  feeling responsible for the outcomes in life.  I love my kids. I want them to be successful in friendships, sports, academics, their pursuit of God, and growing character. I want them to be happy, be nice to each other.  I want them to do their house chores right. Somehow I got myself too tangled in and felt like a failure when they were not happy, or getting along with each other for too many days in a row.  I beat myself up when they were slacking off on chores or school work.  I questioned my "mom abilities" when larger problems would occur and the weight was draining me day after day.  I want my husband to be happy when he comes home from work.  I want him to work less, eat  better, sleep more, and enjoy his family.  I felt burdened with the ponderous task of making all these things happen in his life.  What a joy it  has been these past few days living without this huge and impossible assignment (which I unintentionally appointed my self).  What a joy to wake up knowing that I live and breathe...love and teach, discipline and guide, play, cook, clean and work  by the grace of God and it is for Him that I do it all.  With this in mind, I do not have to carry the burden of the outcome!  And if I can't make everyone happy, it's okay now.  It reminds me of  that very awesome song from R.E.M.  It's the End of the World as We Know it.....and I Feel Fine.  

Around the World in 180 Days!
This year we are traveling around the world for geography class and have enjoyed spending time in Mexico, Brazil, Norway, Canada and Germany. The homemade pretzels were very fun to make but quite tricky! Dropping a doughy pretzel into boiling water for 30 seconds and then retrieving the slippery thing to bake turned out to be the hardest part. We put the odd shaped ones on the bottom of the pile!

No one really liked the kraut very much.

Fresh Air and Foxholes

Last year was the hardest year of my life.  Sometimes nothing more can be done but to dig a foxhole, gather your supplies and fight your enemy and hope for reinforcements or at least a supply drop so you can keep up the battle.

Perhaps I could have come out sooner, but I think I may have adjusted to forgetting I was even in a foxhole -- mistaking it for "life as I now know it".

Part of what I now want to do is get some joy back into life, creating space for it and trusting God a little more to do battle for me.

Thousand Miles blog will hopefully record many of these times as I breathe in some fresh air with people I love and take up some personal interests  for myself that I have laid aside for much too long.

Living life on purpose does take some effort, but the reward is worth it.  I'm breathing better already just talking about it!

It was a good run.

Nearly 8 years of homeschool and our oldest is now attending "formal school".
We are thankful for God providing a wonderful Christian school for her to attend, and so far a smooth transition.
Some of my favorite memories of homeschooling through the 8 years with Chloe:
~making super long timelines on butcher block paper
~listening to tons of audiobooks on nearly all car rides in the elementary school years
~making a cleopatra costume
~Eating lunch outdoors at Byerlys!
~Art class with the Westriches
~nature walks at Elm  Creek
~Ending school early to spend a week at the cabin
~Sleeping in late
~Becoming well read by reading to her all those great Sonlight books
~Forcing Jackson to talk to Leela and give her his passport.  That was fun for us, but not so much for him!
~Making the tabernacle and eating Chinese food
~Laughing every day
~Tons of singing and dancing in the kitchen

Most of all, being a part of every day together:  learning to love through the good days, the bad days, the sick days, the sick of school days, the new babies, the new curriculums, the new jobs, the new homes and all the good things that hard challenges can develop in us.

I've loved it and would not have done it differently....but I know it is time for something new and look forward to all that this new chapter will bring to our lives.

New Year, New Spreadsheets!

The downside to being gone for Christmas Break is that there is no time to clean out the homeschool room, the kids' closets, or do a real good washing of the kitchen floor.  Instead, I come home 2 days before I am planning to start teaching and have to empty the rotten veggies from the fridge, unpack the  loads of suitcases and boxes of gifts, grocery shop, and get the kids back onto a schedule that gets them to bed earlier than 11:00 and up earlier than 10:00.  It is a great blessing to travel back to see family for Christmas, but the return trip of driving 18 hours (and riding in the back seat next to the toddler so that sick older son could have my front seat) celebrating New Years Eve in a hotel  trying to make it "fun" for the teenager and other kids, and all that work awaiting for me when I got home (not to mentioned being jacked up on caffine, sugar and nasty McDonalds) isn't the best way to start out a happy new homeschool year. 
And, I tend to be one of those who loves to start out with great expectations, best intentions, and all my duckies neatly in a row. 

But I did get some beautiful color spreadsheets done that display my new and improved schedule for the homeschool day.  Bonus:  I made new school work planning sheets for the kids that are spanky colored and better lay out each days' work. 

So although I started today 2 hours behind schedule and with a headache and a hang-over feeling from fighting off my older son's virus -- the day did happen without too much difficulty.  Adverbs were introduced, Psalms 23  studied, Multiplication taught, the minute hand of the clock practiced, a playdoh bob the builder sculpted, fractions divided by decimals and converted to percents (or something like that) and even had time to watch Pride and Predjudice with the 9th grader.  Somehow, 4 things didn't get done.  This is the perpetual problem of a homeschool mom optimist who has the faulty idea that more can be accomplished in a day than possible.

Which brings me to my favorite New Year's Resolution:  I will stop when I have 75% of my day's work done -- make time to play with the kids -- and then see if there is time left for the rest.  If not, so be it.  No one will die over it!  Like that?  My kids do (and I do too) and I have gotten to the second world in Super Mario Wii ! 

Weather Alert. Maria, don't read this while drinking -- you'll likely spew the computer.

A STORM TOTAL SNOWFALL OF 4 TO 8 INCHES IS EXPECTED BY THE TIME THIS STORM ENDS. A CHANGE IN THE TRACK OF THE STORM HOWEVER WILL ALTER THE SNOWFALL AMOUNTS.



A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW IS EXPECTED. GUSTY WINDS ARE ALSO POSSIBLE. THIS WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR IMPOSSIBLE.

Things are already closing, even though the chance of snow is only 40% and the storm could easily shift directions and we only get a dusting like all the "storms" since we moved here.
Time will tell...but by my experience at the grocery store tonight I think the entire Lehigh Valley expects to be snowed in for the next 4 days.
The one thing I like about snow days is that when I head out on the streets I get the pleasure of being one of only a few  sparse vehicles driving though the beautiful swirling snow -- seeing the beauty of it before it is tainted by plows, salt, exaust and sludge.
Can't wait to see  it come!

Here is a sign your NOT in the city anymore...

Sign read on the way to the hockey rink this morning:

Baked Cow Tongue  $5.29 a pound

Weekend, please give me one more day!

Roy and Jackson were gone the past 5 days in Chicago for a hockey tournament.  I don't know why this is, but whenever Roy is out of town I get the urge to do big jobs.  This logically doesn't make sense, because one would think that having an extra adult around would make it easier to do things -- but not so in my family.  Ah, now don't rush to judgement that I'm making an implicating statement..it's just the facts.

So, I spent most of my weekend being productive.  One thing that was not accomplished that was sorely needed was cleaning my master bathroom and bedroom.  The other thing.......planning out the week with learning goals, or prepping for teaching highschool history.  The other thing not even attempted was menu planning. Therefore, I am just NOT ready for Monday.
Highlights of the weekend~

Family room accent wall painted.  Audrey loves the new paint color  -- she says it makes her think of chocolate.  She may be equal to me in my love and appreciation of chocolate.
Upstairs hallways and the stairwell also were painted and finished this weekend.
Chloe had a friend over and was able to snack on a yummy variation of caramel crunch chex mix.
I reigned one more weekend as champion of Sequence and we learned how to play Bananagrams.
Played trains, cars, and a creative game of Calico Critters.
Got in a little jumping on the trampoline.
Went for a walk at Trexler Park and let Benjamin walk most of the way (1 mile is a long way for a toddler who must stop and play in every patch of mud).
Exercised each day.
Watched Muppets from Space.  I don't recommend it.  I nearly fell asleep. It was worth it, though because Audrey's laugh can make the most dull moment joyful.
Of course, there are those constant things like laundry and cooking and sweeping that can't be ignored...but even though it seems like I did some important tasks, I am just not at all ready for the week to come. Looking back, I can't say that I should have spent my time any other way, however.  And so, Monday will come and although I am unprepared,  I'll lean on God to direct me to run the day in the direction He wants it to go. 
Have a great Monday, everyone.

Quick poem reflecting 5 minutes in the life of Benjamin.

Toddler on the table and plates on the floor. 
Rattle rattle bang means he learned to open the door.
Stomp, stomp scream means there isn't anymore
 Live Boxelder bugs on the kitchen floor.

Take away, take away get it from his hand.
Hurry clear the spot where his tantrum will land.
squirm, screech, screeeech means this one will be grand.
Spanky spanky time on his pudgy, naughty hand.

What did he say? Does he want a cracker too?
Time to go bye bye Toddler just brought over a shoe.
Quick hug, trains in hand, I think that word was new!
All forgotten, happy boy, a smile and laugh now, too!

The kids have been stealing my camera

After this picture, I promptly took Benjamin to get his hair cut!

Have I ever mentioned that I love homeschooling?

It's a pure blessing to accomplish things of eternal value every day. 
Everytime kids are bickering I have the opportunity to steer them toward Christ -- helping them see the sinful nature we all have and our need for forgiveness and grace.
When the kids are learning about natural things in science I can help lead them to see God's glory.Or when we are reading the stories of human triumph as well as terror and tyranny I can guide them toward seeing God's threads of grace woven through all of time as he sovereignly lays out the plan he has for his creation.
There are an unquantifiable amount of opportunities for me to learn more patience, more caution, and more prudence.....and even more lessons to learn in being more merciful, longsuffering, and less self-centered.

I'm a forgetful person, so now I have this post to look back at when I need it.

Do a bad job of it.

I don't think I clearly realize how true this is....and I may deny it to myself when the clarity does strike.....but I frequently DON'T do what I want to do simply because I believe I don't have the time to do a great job at it.

So this week, I am going to do stuff -- and do a bad job of it. I'll do it to my best, but be okay with it turning out...well....bad!

Here is what I will do a bad job of this week and be okay about:

1. Write a bad post on blog (hey! I accomplished that already).

2. Exercise for less time than planned and with less intensity than I'd like to.

3. Read to Audrey when I'm too tired to make fun voices for all the characters.

4. Kindof clean the bathrooms.

5. Finally finish the video montage' from our summer visit to MN.

The all or nothing approach is a form of perfectionism (ick! I'm a perfectionist?) and perfectionism is one of the results of pride. So, time for some humility and no more putting off a job until I can do it just right.

A Song.

Take me away on a Vespa on the windy road between country and suburb. It's not a long drive, but it's a sweet ride, and all I need to keep me sane.

I'm not complaining, but it's been a hard day. I've got a toddler and a teenage daughter. So pardon my shortfalls and lack of patience, but Vespa come take me away.

Birthdays

Birthdays are best when...

• a seven year old girl tries to wake up earlier than mom to suprise her with breakfast
• enormous cards filled with loving words are presented
• home-made gifts are given along with hugs and warm smiles
• strange birthday song traditions live on for yet another year
• lunch is eaten at a delicious italian restaurant...no kids...and it's pouring rain outside
• you know that this is the last year left in your 30's
• baby takes a nice, long nap.
  
  It was a good birthday.

Deep in the woods-- Lost.

On the way home from MN we spontaneously visited Cook Forest State Park. It gets almost as close as one can get to visiting "ancient" trees in North America. Very beautiful! This picture was taken while I was still enjoying myself. About 30 minutes later I had a melt down because we still hadn't found Roy and Benjamin -- who had hiked a little ahead of us and we weren't exactly sure which trail they went on.

We never did find them on the hike until we all met back up at the car. We ended up getting back from our MN trip about 4 hours off our schedule due to the mishap in the woods as well as some unexpected traffic on 80.
Ah, well.....It will make for a good story in a couple years.

Do you read this?

Should I re-surface this blog?
Been thinking about it. I enjoy reading the couple people who still blog the little things in their day and wonder if I should start this one up again.
Perhaps no one comes by to look anymore...being abandoned for quite some time now.

But, if by chance you see this and find my posts entertaining....let me know.

I call this: Dirt, Cookies, and Drool

Basically this is what Benjamin looks like most of the time. Why fight it? This picture was taken after we spent the morning at the Rose Gardens in Allentown. He loves flowers, but this day he loved the dirt more. It was much, much worse, but I think the little leftovers looks cute.

1.5 months left

I'm hitting the part of homeschooling where I struggle to go that last mile. Kindof like in a marathon -- there are a small, very small, few who are still striding galiantly toward the finish line. The largest group of the pack are walking and limping the last 3 miles. There are some who already quit due to injury or maybe poor training. Then there is the group that is plodding along simply concentrating on moving their feet to a rhythmic pattern...left, right, left right...focusing on just getting there. They are afraid that if they shift their speed by either slowing down or speeding up they will thwart any chance of making it.

I'm hoping I can end these last one and a half months with enthusiasm and creativity -- but I'll also be happy with the steady plodding....getting done what needs to get done. Today I am taking time to map out these last weeks and take some time to pray. I'm hoping that I end with the excitement of the beginning.

I don't homeschool because...

I don't homeschool because...

I'm hiding from the authorities.
I'm trying to keep my kids from learning as much as the public school kids.
I have a fear of other people's kids.
I'm a control freak.
I was picked on as a child.
I have genius kids who would be bored in any other setting.
I don't know what else to do with all my saintly qualities like "patience".

Benjamin is clapping for himself because he worked very hard at getting out baseballs from Jackson's baseball bucket and throwing them onto the floor. We clapped for him and so he clapped for himself and had a great time.

Now he claps everytime he stands up all by himself and throws anything. Audrey was disgusted with this "show off" brother of hers and thought he should be more humble and not be praising himself so much. I told her that he is just clapping after doing the things that we clap for -- to copy us, not praise himself. She felt better. I'm not sure if what I said was true or not, however, because who knows the inner workings of a 12 month old.